P.S.: Your stories would be of great
value to us. If you would like to share with us
your experience in completing a remembrance album
for your baby, please give us your contact information
in our mailing list area and tell us your story.
Dear
Mr.& Mrs. Gordon,
I am writing to express my sincere thanks
for my album that arrived today.
After losing my baby at five-months
pregnant, it has been so hard for me to move forward.
I have all of the cards that I received, flowers that
I kept, and all of the memories that I never ever
want to fade. Most importantly, have my baby's ultrasound
picture that I will forever cherish; and that I know
I am so lucky to have. This just happened September
11, my birthday of all days, so I did not know what
I was going to do with all of these raw emotions,
until came across your album. I wasn't even looking
for it. I was actually researching the type of miscarriage
that I had. I feel that it was a gift to me from God.
Having the album has brought
me more comfort than I can ever explain to you in
a letter. I will always hold this sacred, as
it contains the tangible evidence of my baby's life.
And while I may not be able to hold my baby in my
arms~it was my baby, it was real, and I always want
it to be close to me. With your album, I now
have that.
Thank you for sharing your experiences
and thank you for giving me comfort.
God bless you, as you have blessed
me.
L. J.
Evansville, Indiana
Dear
Russ & June,
Thank you for sharing your beautiful
album-journal with me. As Russ knows how I still
feel about the baby I lost to a miscarriage, it helps
a great deal that other people are wanting to share
their sympathy & concern. I have written in my
journal things I never verbalized before & feel
a lot better. It’s been eleven years since my miscarriage
and it is amazing how much it still affects me.
I truly admire what you two are
doing and thankful that God has touched you in this
way.
Thank
you again,
Yours
in Christ,
J.S.,
Colorado Springs.
“…when
you lose that life (the baby), where do you put it?
I remember the day that I got that bag in my
hand (with the album) and I remember looking through
there…and for the first time thinking, “hello
Christopher, welcome back- you’re a part of
our family…the permission and the freedom that
that gave me as a mother…this album has freed
me…why is it that we are not teaching women
or giving them tools and resources to cherish what
we’ve been given? This album provides a tangible
way to do that.
S.N., Colorado Springs
Two
close friends gave me my album. I
can't tell you how
much it meant
to me. It meant
so much because
all of the sonograms, pictures,
mementos, footprints and other things I had
were in a manila envelope
tucked deep inside a chest. Anytime
I wanted or needed to look at
the items, I had
to dig through
the envelope. To have a place
where all of her “things” were
was very meaningful.
Receiving
the album was also important because I could now show
people my baby. Many were surprised that
I even had anything to fill it with. It also
readily made my little girl real to me.
At times when you go through a tragedy like losing
a baby you tend to feel as if it were all a dream,
but having the album helped me make her “real”
to me.
As I completed the
album, by adding photos, bracelet, footprints, a piece
of hair, healing began. It was a therapeutic process
and every time I would look at it the healing continued.
I
am so grateful that I had friends who thought of me
and gave me this precious gift. I scrapbook
and I knew that I wanted to eventually put her pictures
in an album, but I just didn’t know how to really
do it. With this gift, everything was ready
for me. I didn’t have to think about what
to do, I just had to add the items I already had.
I will never be able to express my thanks to
those who made this wonderful healing ministry a part
of my life.
K. S.,
Denver, CO
When a couple
loses a baby, healing comes not from the forgetting,
but remembering. When a baby dies at birth or shortly
after, nobody has known that baby so there are no
communal memories.
Mementos play an important part in the grieving
process by allowing parents to create memories
of their child and bring reality to the life
of their child.
As bereavement
coordinator at Memorial Hospital's NICU for over 10
years, I realized there was a profound need for grieving
parents to have a way of remembering their baby.
Baby albums are an intrinsic part of most new parents’
memories of their child's birth and early childhood
but the usual baby book does not apply. Because of
this, the bereaved parents are left without their
precious baby and without a way of remembering them.
Since June
and Russ Gordon's development of the memories album,
the parents of infants that have died in the NICU
now have a way to remember. The album provides
statements to encourage journaling which is very therapeutic
in dealing with loss. Our families have expressed
such gratitude in having an album available for their
very special baby and the healing that came from it.
Every bereaved parent, in my opinion,
would benefit from the caring and gentle manner in
which the album supports families through their grief
journey.
Sue Stack,
RN
NICU Clinical Coordinator
NICU Bereavement Coordinator
Memorial Hospital NICU
